Friday, December 15, 2006

Worst. Toys. Ever. =)

Check them out! Not so much "worst" as, well, "un-safest." =)Awesome description of the trajectory of the Sky Dancer, and hey! Thingmaker fans! We made a top 10 list after the dot-com bust! Oops, sorry. It's the original Thingmaker, not ours...

"You know what I saw in their eyes? Fear."

And—Wow!—the actual spring-launched missile firing toy that fired its load into some sad fool kid's mouth and a lawsuit later, ruined it for the rest of us! I've referred to the incident many a time when bemoaning the end of spring-launched toy rocket power, usually in relation to the Boba Fett action figure, but beyond some kid in Atlanta (I thought) choking on a projectile he fired into his mouth, I didn't know the details. And I always thought it was from an earliest release of the send-in-your-proofs-of-purchase Boba, but I think that Zorky(?) told me a while back that the Boba Fetts *never* had launchable rockets. His backpack missile would just "pop" in place, and not actually fire. Maybe the clones were designed to be impotent? Anyhow, turns out the culprit was an old-school BSG toy!

To be fair, I can't claim complete and total ballistic deprivation/indignation. I *did* get to participate in some dangerous projectile playtime thanks to the Micronauts—Take THAT, Baron Karza! Go, Biotron! Commander Rann can sit in your chest and pilot you as a tank, a robot, or a something-that-I-don't-know-what-to-call-it!

Stupid kid's esophagus. Intelligent design, my butt!

Keep on keepin on~

1 comment:

zorknapp said...

My recollection (which, as ever, is crystal clear) from my childhood is that the Boba Fett figure was supposed to have a launchable backpack missle, like the launchable missles on my Battlestar Galactica toys.

However, after I sent in my proof of purchases to get the action figure (for free?), when it came, there was a form letter included stating that because of safety issues, the missle now would *not* launch.

A sad day in the Lord household.

Especially since I had toys that did launch missles.

I liked shooting them in my closed eyeballs.

I'm sure there's some nerdy collector out there who still has the notice from Kenner about the non-launching backpack. Can I hear a shout out from the nerds in the back of the room?